Mahjong session ytd night w Ferlyn, Ken, Zhihan &Patrick came over for awhile. Hmmmmmmm. Dead tired today.. :( QIANEN, when gonna mj w me?!

It wasnt until I found my thoughts returning back to what happened on fri again and again, that i realised how much it affected me.. I joke so much.. But who rly knows what goes on in my mind? Sigh. After that flaming and right up to the moment i reached home, everything was a blur.. Except the period outside DBLO.. that registered clearly in my brain..

Maybe I've always prided myself on being there for my friends whenever they needed me, esp those close ones.. &friends have always been a very large part of my life.. Disappointment is an understatement, to say the least, of how i felt when my closest ones left me behind w those I barely knew. But all i could think of was those who left.. I was practically inconsolable until Ken came back for me..

Its not just a drama scene that happened when I was drunk. Somehow, it showed me how much my friends care.. For once, Im starting to wonder, am i really so unimportant to my friends? I wish I could explain how i feel right now.. So hurt, so alone, so.. forsaken.